Monday, August 07, 2006

Seeking clarity

There's a full moon on Wednesday, called Sturgeon or Green Corn moon by the Indians. It celebrates plentiful fish, ripening of grain, the first fruits, the promise of good harvest. But it also isn't a done deal -- while things look promising, the harvest isn't in yet.

It feels unsettled around here, around the world. Bombs and bullets are flying in the MidEast, gas prices may go to maybe $4 a gallon, the heat wave has caused death and destruction in its journey across the country. Although our weather today was remarkably comfortable (windows open all day!), it also is ripe for thunderstorms and lightening strikes that start fires.

This moon marks the end of summer in some ways -- okay, maybe not here, where 100-degree days are likely clear into October -- but school will be back in session next week for many, and others aren't far behind. Fashions show sweaters and leggings (shades of the late '90s!) and boots, while most of us are getting sick of wearing our summer linens and shorts and sandals but know we're stuck with them for another 45 days at least. Yuk.

It feels unbalanced, on edge, waiting for something to happen that will snap us out of these dog days doldrums, back into the flow of life.

I feel it, sort of like one of those crossroads in life where everything will be affected by which way I choose to go. Except I'm not entirely sure what the choices are, which makes it difficult, and that only contributes to the unsettled feeling.

The full moon only exacerbates strong feelings in any month. Shining on an already unsettled world, it may well reveal truths and lies that have been shadowed for some time.

And it also may bring clarity to actions and decisions and pathways. That incredible light illuminates our landscape in blacks and whites, rather than the sunlit confusion of color.

I hate dithering, feeling unsettled, knowing that there are decisions I must make, and trying to figure out just what is at stake. It makes me anxious, unable to really move in any direction -- and that's not good for business nor for me!

So I'll be outside on Wednesday night, watching the moon rise, listening to the night and to my heart and mind, in hopes that what is hidden might be seen more clearly. I know I won't be the only seeker.

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