Waiting for change

Many things are pointing to something new for me, except I'm not sure what it is. Both of the online tarot readings that I use sometimes tell me this; my intuition says I'm on the brink of more change, or that I'm letting go of something old in preparation for something new.

This year has been full of transition and change, and I certainly am ready to let go of the grief and heartache. In so many ways my life is so sweet: I have this amazingly wonderful love and one who cherishes me the way I am, I work hours of my choosing for the most part, free from the political shenanigans of office life (yes, there are politically driven things, but NOT in our little office), I have a great home in a wonderful area, I have kitties to pet, books to read, good food to eat. I don't know that it gets any better than this. (well, winning the lottery would be okay, except I never buy a ticket)

So what's going on?

At this time in my life, I'm less welcoming of change. Change now can mean not-so-great things -- health issues, or money issues, or things-happening-to-the-kids issues. And because I cherish so much of our routine everyday life, I don't want to see anything happening to that.

So I'll just try to be mindful, be aware of what is happening around me and what choices I make, even if they seem inconsequential. Look within for answers. Watch for opening doors and windows, for new pathways, for suggestions.

The other night I had a very vivid dream: I'd been feeling a little stressed about work and volunteer tasks, feeling the need for better balance and yet my mind teeming with ideas for both. In the dream, work was in one heavy suitcase in my hand, volunteer work was in another heavy suitcase in my other hand. I gave myself permission in the dream to put them both down and sleep without worrying about them, understanding that I could pick them up again in the morning. It doesn't get much clearer than that, does it!