Sunday, March 11, 2007

The more things change...

the more they stay the same.

Well, not really the same. But the saga of our youngest daughter's stay in California is coming full circle as she prepares to travel back east to live, and there are many elements in this whole story that are very familiar --

Oh, certainly the circumstances are mostly different. She's changed and is older, certainly some wiser, and with more job potential than she had when she arrived. Other things, like making choices that weren't necessarily well thought out and waiting until just before things start tanking big time to make decisions, have overtones of previous situations -- some of which we helped rescue her from.

And yet. She's our kid. We want good things for her. We agree that her choice to leave a relationship and move is probably the best for her. We just want her to be well, to be happy, to have enough.

She'll be back with her sister, my daughter, although not living with her. And they do support each other and lean on each other -- I hope this will be good for them both. Again. (They lived together in 2001 when we moved the youngest from Chicago to the South -- but they aren't good roommates.)

*sigh*

it's just always something, isn't it.

She'll be under our roof this week as she wraps up loose ends and prepares for this long trip, so there will be a little adjusting for all of us...and yet, things are different. She came here a little more than a year and a half ago and lived here, mostly, until about a year ago when she started truck driving school. Since then we've seen her a few times every month, usually for just a few hours.

But she comes back to us for advice (not that she takes it, at least at the moment)....and this time, she was hearing the same advice and concern that we'd expressed from some friends back east.

Y'know how you plant seeds in the garden and hope that some of them will bear fruit if you tend and water them? Well, giving advice to children is similar, although the tending and watering generally were done in their younger years. We throw out these little tidbits here and there, and sometimes we get to see that they've taken root.

That's how we feel tonight, listening to her. Some of our words rooted in her 20-something brain, and she's making choices that are more true to who she is and what she wants. It's gratifying.

And I suppose we'd best savor that feeling in this moment only, because we both know things will change. For this week, though, she's safe and fed and being nurtured.

I'm reading various magazines, and Sanctuary by Nora Roberts.

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