Friday, December 17, 2010

Reverb 10 -- Friends and learning lessons

For Dec. 16 -- Friendship. How has a friend changed you or your perspective on the world this year? Was this change gradual, or a sudden burst?

I spent a lot of time thinking about friendship this year, and also have been blessed to spend time with many friends.

One dear woman who I've known since 1982, through our divorces, through our children's trials and growing pains, through grandchildren, through cancer and surgeries, lives some 2000 miles away; yet when we do see each other every three or so years, it's always like we were never apart.

Despite fighting two different cancers over the last two years, her outlook is positive, grateful, and very down-to-earth. She inspires me to see the glass as half-full, and to just move through whatever comes along.

My husband is also my best friend, and there is nothing I cannot talk to him about. I am so grateful for that bond and the love which wraps us up daily. There is nowhere I'd rather be than with him, no matter where that takes us. He helps me to be grounded in what is real and now, and calms me if I get 'wrapped around the axle' about something. I adore him...

I've learned -- again -- that there are seasons for friendships, and that sometimes you 'outgrow' people who were important in your life at one time. Or they outgrow you. It is hard for me to let go of a friendship, even one that has clearly cooled. This year I've spent far too much time trying to accept that, questioning myself (as I tend to do) for a possible cause. The simple fact is that sometimes people move onto other things -- I've done it too -- and it isn't anyone's fault but simply is time to bless it and let the relationship drift.

For Dec. 17 -- Lesson learned. What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward?

I believe that I have finally learned patience and that all things will change, given time. That lesson has been given to me over and over and over for years. But this year brought healing the broken bones in my wrist, listening to what my gut is telling me to do, accepting changing friendships, and moving through a long and tedious process to help Princess #1 with her illness and disability claim. I did it without having a nervous breakdown, going on medication, crying every day, or wishing my life away by saying ...'when this happens, then I will be happy-glad-okay-.' That is progress. I hope I can keep that outlook.

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