Monday, December 29, 2008

Full house

Both the princesses and the little princeling are living under our roof at present, and I'm doing pretty well in keeping my cool, if I do say so.

It's not that there is no drama. We brought Princess V and the princeling from Redding very late Saturday night after her BF came home smashed and got belligerent, and she called 911. She and Princess R went up there today to collect most of the rest of her stuff. And I got to babysit....which I also did yesterday.

A side note: amazing how those skills never leave. I'm changing diapers, feeding, and hoisting him around on my hip like I haven't had a 30-year gap between babies...

All of them are moving out this week to live together in a little house R found about a month ago. Do I have my doubts? Oh yeah. Am I worrying about how it will work? Nope. Really.

About a month-six weeks ago I made a very conscious decision to stop trying to manage anything except my own life, and I've done a good job with it with only a few slips. Both girls have spoken to me, worried that "something was wrong" because I seemed so "fragile."

Makes me laugh! I am anything but fragile, and Tony told both of them that too. I'm just not asking as many questions nor offering much advice, and I told them both that, and that the lack of questioning was probably what they were noticing! I'm watching it unfold, watching as they make choices and decisions, and trying to be passively supportive. Which I am -- not necessarily with the choices or decisions, but I am about THEIR RIGHT TO DO SO.

In other words, folks, what I'm doing is practicing actively what I preach so often: we make our own destiny. Nobody else can determine the course of our lives except we ourselves.

If it works and nothing catastrophic happens, I'll be thrilled. Am I skeptical? You betcha. But I'm trying not to project that out, either. I'm just trying to enjoy having our grandson here to play with and rock and feed (and give to his mama to change the stinkies). And enjoy having both girls here too, for the bit of time left. I'm offering help in finding stuff for the house and a bit of money to help, but it's up to them to accept it or not, and I'm not offended if they don't want the help.

So next weekend we should be back to two of us with two cats. Sounds good to me.

I'm glad they're both here and safe for the moment, and I hope things will work out for them, but I am no longer interested in managing the process. That's good growth for me, and also for them.

Meanwhile, we're going to see Antsy McClain and the Trailer Park Troubadours tonight at the State Theatre -- just Tony and me. Ought to be a great way to unwind!

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