Monday, December 12, 2011

Reverb 11 -- Day 12 -- 12 Things

Prompt: 12 Things - What are 12 things your life doesn’t need in 2012?
How will you go about eliminating them?
How will getting rid of these 12 things change your life?
If you did Reverb10, how are you making out on your 11 Things from last year?
Both lists had this as today's prompt. So what don't I need?

1. Stress. In so many ways my life is pretty UN-stressful, really, and I know how lucky I am. Nonetheless, I have stress associated with paperwork for R, her disability and how she is coping (nobody wants this for their child, believe me), and making sure things are in order to keep Social Security, Medicare, MediCal, and the county happy. (It amuses me no end that there is so much paperwork associated with disability, and yet the disabled person is expected to complete lengthy, confusing forms!) There is always a residual worry about Tony traveling that awful highway between Red Bluff and Chico, although that has been considerably reduced and will end completely within a few months. So things will lighten up soon.
2. Clutter. This was on my 2010 list too, and I've made progress this year. There still is the attic to tackle, and I just  was looking in my desk drawers for Christmas cards which I'm sure are somewhere: Not, however, in the drawer, although there is way too much old stuff that needs sorting through.  I've cleaned out bathroom drawers and cupboards, eliminated stacks of old magazines, and I've been fairly ruthless about sorting through clothes that no longer work for me. We'll just keep sorting and recycling and pitching this next year!
3. Illness or injury. Also on my 2010 list, these are things I definitely do not want, and that keeps me going to the doctors and dentist for checkups.We eat healthily, take supplements, and I've been faithfully doing yoga nearly every week, usually twice a week, or using either the treadmill or the whole body vibration. That's real progress over last year.
4. Self-criticism. Nobody can wrap me around the axle about my faults and deficiencies more than I can. My talent for self-flagellation is still entirely too present too often. I know I have wonderful friends and family who support and love me. Why is it still so hard to lighten up on my own expectations?
5. 20 lbs. It's still there, although I lost the same 10 lbs several times this year and then let it creep back. It's there now. It needs to leave permanently in 2012.
6. Negative people. I don't like being around them and I don't have to be. Same goes for mean, untrustworthy people.
7. Bad habits. Spending too much time on the computer jumping from link to link, for instance -- I can putz away hours just reading blogs or websites or browsing online shoe stores! Eating too much because it tastes good instead of stopping when I am satisfied. Putting off things like sorting through papers and cleaning off my desk.
8. Self-imposed limits. Sometimes these are good; for instance, when eating M&Ms or gummy bears. But when I begin to question my abilities or claim I'm 'too old' to do something, I need to figure out what's really going on and deal with it. I should have no limits on what I want to do and am able to do!
9. Over-performance when it isn't necessary. I do not have to pass a white glove test of my house (good thing, too!) I am competing with absolutely nobody in how I choose to look, what I wear, how much I get done in any given day, if and when I volunteer for something, or how I want to spend my time. Lighten up.
10. Guilt. This is induced by the acts as described above and a few thrown in from way long ago past crap. A stupid, unnecessary emotion. You'd think I'd been raised Catholic or Jewish, ferpetessake -- all that guilt is just wasted on a Protestant! Get over it.
11. People who make me feel uncomfortable. I don't care if this is someone I've known for a long time or a clerk in a store or someone in a group that I belong to: if I'm uncomfortable being around them, I need to seriously look at why I'm there. Life is too short to waste time in such situations. I want to be with people who are interesting and intelligent and who like me and who I like in return.
12. Old files. I am never going to need my old teaching files again. Ditto my college essays and papers, or -- oh yes -- even some of my high school ones. Somehow I think my long-ago attempts at poetry are not likely to be published posthumously and I do not think my children will want them either. I have old bills and paperwork files stored in the attic  -- as does Tony -- and we need to shred or burn them this year!
Here's my list from last year -- actually quite similar. These issues didn't just arise this year, and I just keep working on them. I know I will benefit from allowing these things to fade away and not be so present in my life. Life is short. I want to love what I have left of it!

No comments: